Friday, November 30, 2007

My Night of a 1,000 Random Reality Stars

Last night, my friend Bill and I stopped over at a bar in Boystown called "Halsted's." We had invites to attend a party there promoting a new TV show called "In the Loop." By the look of the crowd, it should be renamed "In the Butt." Maybe that is what PNS will be called when we make it big. But I got some pics with some of the reality-star celebs in the hizzy. Enjoy!

Dale (from "Top Chef") and me

Bill Rancic from "The Apprentice"

He had to leave early to go pick up his wife - Guiliana DEPENDSIES from the airport. So I couldn't get a pic with him.

Jamie Blyth of "The Bachelorette"
He can bachelor my rette all night long. I took tons of photos of his butt.

Me, Brice Cooper(from "Design on a Dime"), and Rex (nice nipple ring!)

BTW - Brice Cooper was sweet and so darn adorable.

Kim Coles of "Living Single" and me. Huh?

Chicago's Foremost Entertainer -- Miss Foozie. Look at those pineapples!

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Thursday, November 29, 2007

hosts hit on her at the end

mmm ...


and chu, and chu, and chu.... chu gonna ruv me

OK, I have NO issue with this girl's voice.. it is clearly PHENOMINAL.
But nothing really quite gets me going more than a good old fashioned ASIAN GAME SHOW or ASIAN REALITY SHOW.

I believe that this one is called
"Star King"

Here's the best things to watch for:
- her shoes (i.e. high top LA Gear or Keds)
- the audience (I would think they were acting, but they already have Lucy Liu and that's all the actors that Asia can manage at one time)
- the SUBTITLES... yes, read them. Look for the one entitled "all your (short) hairs standing"

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Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Here it iz y'allz! My new "ink"...

So, it's going to be a complete reach-around short sleeve incorporating the seraphim already there. And the long diagonal lines will be rays of light. Thanks Madonna. And yes, it's all flowers and birds and bugs and gay shit like that. A-what-what! Jealous?

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What Corner of Hell is This?

I don't even know where to begin with this picture. I saw it in People Magazine and knew I had to put it on the blog. Barbra posing in her nighty. That damn dog. You know it gets treated better than any of us ever will. Poor James Brolin -- relegated to the back row. Eddie Murphy and his tranny. And Rhea "f'ing" Perlman. Carla Tortelli -- You have come a long way, baby.

There is so much more to be said about this photo. Your thoughts on the picture....

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Monday, November 26, 2007

Charlotte Rae Drops The Soap in the Shower

Hey, it's Char Rae in the 50's. Thanks to Kyle P. for putting this photo up on our FACEBOOK page.

The last three seconds is worth hanging out. It gets kind of kinky.

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Check out MY new tattoo, y'alls!

So what, Noah...JEALOUS?! I think they placed the cat too high in relation to the navel...

I actually did get one last week, but it's just the outline. I start getting the color (RACIST!) at the end of December. I'll post the real one soon, if anyone cares. And I'm sure they don't. Sad-sies. (Whaaah-whaaah).

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Saturday, November 24, 2007

Happy Christmas and seig heil!

It's officially time for Heidi Klum's ridiculous "(s)hit single", Wonderland. It hit #13 on the German charts last year!

And is that her bejeweled boob in the first couple second of the video?! What do YOU think it is?

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

It's the MOST Wonderful Time... of the YEAR!

Just passing by Bloomingdale's Home Store in the Medinah "Shirley" Temple here in Chicago yesterday, I noticed that, like many corporate giants, they have a Holiday "theme"....

I thought to my self, "NOW I know EXACTLY where to shop for Pat, Noah and Robbie. And possibly Scott."

Happy HOLE-idays everyone.

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Tuesday, November 20, 2007


piping hot gyne

what do u think it smells like in here? :

Mommy, make my eyebrows look like you circa True Blue n' junk!

Now take me to ballet class and get me 5000 American Girl Dolls stat.


Got 'Stache?

Poor little Lourdes Ciccone Leon-Ritchie.

Not only did she get Mamma Madonna's big 80s bushy Frida Kahlo eyebrows, but now she must endure the junior highschool curse of the Italian girl mustache.

Can't Madge give her a wax?

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Hey there sonny...

Have a Werthers. Go on. Have a Werthers. What? Who doesn't like Werthers. Seriously, have a Werthers. Take one. Plenty more Werthers where that came from.

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Monday, November 19, 2007

I Hope Kirk Douglas Put PolyGrip On His Dentures

Cuz once John Travolta has got you in his cross-hairs (or short hairs), there is no turning back. Thank you Geiger for sending this photo.

Based on this photo, what award do you think Kirk Douglas won?

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Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Either you're in...

Thank Jebus this show is back! Who did you like and who do you think needs to be OUT?

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Tuesday, November 13, 2007

The Soup Bitch-Slaps Beyonce

I got this vidjoe from "The Soup." It is making fun of Beyonce's newest American Express commercial. It is about a minute and a delight.




Sunday, November 11, 2007

queefs - protools =


i am so pumped to be able to cunttribute to this blog!

love, licoricepirate
(one of the 3? straight listeners)

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

OK! Magazine is a big fat liar.

'Member when they were all, Oh, Britney scooted her ass on the dress and Jamie Preston Scott or whatever pooped his diedee on the Leica camera lens and Britney ate fried chicken?? 'Member they said that their weren't any good pictures from that??!? 'MEMBER?

LIES. Clearly, she is being set up people.

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Monday, November 05, 2007

I Got A New Tattoo Too


My new moist n' healing tattoo

Inspired by architecture ornaments around Chicago.


Thursday, November 01, 2007

Is Kevin Federline there plaze?

Hi Kevin, its Britney. ...No, Spears. ANYWAYS, I wanted you to know that I just went on a shoppin' spree at SPENCER'S GIFTS at the Malibu Mall, what-what! Jealous!? Don't even answer 'cause I know y'are, ok? Can I see mah ding-dang kids now plaze?

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