Kinkos hires Teri Schaivo to be new spokesperson in employee recruitment campaign.

(AP) In a move that surprised even Stephen Hawkings, Kinkos announced today they've hired Teri Shaivo (pictured) to be their new spokesperson for a campaign aimed at recruiting new employees. Neither camp would disclose how much it took for the woman famously known for such things as slobbering and saying "gggaaaaaaa," but a source close to the situation says that Kinkos knows she's worth every penny. A representative of the company had this statement:

We at Kinkos take pride that our employees are mindless, unavailable people. As our company continues to expand, we want to make sure we have the person representing us possesses all of the qualities we want our employees to possess. And with that, we're thrilled Teri could join us!