air quotes

I "scayar" children, I don't "bath" regularly, I haven't been "touched" by my "husband" months, mah career is in the "shitter", im "piddling" away my fortune, I have a nasty speed "habit", I "cut" myself with a broken "Boone's" bottle, my extensions are made from "chinese sex slaves", I have severe "dandrif", my pussy constantly "drips" "yellowish fluid", my hygene is "dodgy" "at best", I have yet to fish out a broken off "hot dog" from my butt from last night's "barn orgy", my thighs look like "cous cous", .... *continues for several hours*