Sunday, August 13, 2006

This Flavor of Love Tastes Nasty (But in the Good Way)

I have fallen in love with Flava Flav's new show - Flavor of Love. You know Flava Flav -- that lil black dude with a big clock around his neck -- like below:

So if you don't know about it. It is like your run-of-the-mill reality/contest show. 20 or so skeezies (and I am being kind) compete for Flava Flav's affection. Flava says he is looking for a woman to take care of his house and his children. Fun - Sign me up! He takes their real names and gives 'em all nicknames -- which he can barely remember.

Names like: Like Dat, Buckwild (it was an easy one for him cuz she actually had that on her belt buckle), Bucky (cuz he liked her bucket), and Sumthin (who took a steaming dump on the floor in the first episode).

To give you a "flavor" of the quality of contestants, below are some pics of the contestants from last season: (can't find any of the current season's contestants yet):

the demure one - bet she will be a doctor someday.

i think her name is hoopz - she is doing for basketballs what that asian chick in "priscilla queen of the desert" did for ping pong balls.

i bet her mom is real proud of this shot. seriously, i bet she is beaming.

I am not kidding-- the contestants on this show make The Pussycat Dolls look like Laura Ingalls Wilder. I have a theory that the contestants were given the choice between prison and this show. They are fightening -- but in the best way.

In the first show alone:

  • two gals got into a fist fight (with one girl having to be carried out of Flava Flav's mansion kicking and screaming)
  • one girl got wasted beyond belief (nickname TOASTY)
  • and, as previously said, some girl took a MASSIVE dump on the floor.

This is just the first episode. I swear that someone is gonna get murdered. I watch the show with my friend Geiger on VH1 on Sundays. Please join us.


Anonymous licoricepirate said...

ugh not this show.

i just remember in one of the previews, two of the 'ladies' got into an argument over who was classier & someone got hurt ..

4:39 PM  
Anonymous erik said...

Goddamnit. Like i needed another show on my tivo.

I didn't believe you when you said someone took a dump on the floor in the first show.

I didn't even believe it when the title of the episode was "sumthin's stinkin' in the house of flav".

Oh but I believe it now.

4:49 PM  
Anonymous erik said...

omg i need to bleach my eyes now

I'm just sayin'.

7:44 PM  
Anonymous aaron said...

omg, i need to bleach my asshole now and get ready for it's debut on television if the whole world's going to see me squatting and dumping a pile onto the floor in da house of flav!

9:58 AM  
Anonymous gangrene said...

The show is unbelievably painful to watch. It it weren't for Patrick being there on the phone...wait, if it weren't for Patrick, there is no GD way I would ever watch this crap. Literally.

Still, a train wreck is a train wreck. I'm totally rooting for Buckwild!


10:22 AM  

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